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About
Music has been the emotional thread of my life.
I grew up in Brooklyn, the daughter of a concert pianist with 3 older siblings who are musicians. Besides hearing classical music constantly, I listened to the albums my siblings left behind – from The Beatles and Hendrix to Miles, Ella, and Coltrane – and I attended my family’s performances and took on the role of fan, one that has been a challenge to let go of.
I bought my first electric guitar at Manny’s on 48th street when I was 14, and started to teach myself Led Zeppelin riffs. I began experimenting with my own music, all the while playing flute in orchestras all over New York City. I got lost somewhere in there and instead of playing my own music I began dating musicians while modeling. I had a successful career as an actress in independent film and Off-Broadway theater… which I ended by indulging in self destructive behavior.
After I hit that proverbial bottom I moved away from performing and spent a few years healing and recovering. I loved the exploration of psychology – my own and others; I was actually training to be a therapist when I found my way to music again. It was, after all, my first language.
I became the lead vocalist in several New York City bands and had a great time being on stage again. But playing others’ music left me empty.
I then began to focus on writing music again, quietly, just for myself.
I studied music production for songwriters which opened a world of possibilities and new ways for me to express my songs.
This album is Inspired by so many events: my whole life in the larger sense, and more specifically by the sudden death of both of my parents right after I was married, as well as the birth of my daughter. Being a mother cracked me open and made me realize that the most important gift I could give to my daughter was to risk doing the thing I’m most passionate about, without thought to how it’s received.
My producer Tony Conniff is my mentor and an inspiration on many levels. His consistent guidance, support and devotion have been instrumental in the completion of this album.
My husband Neal Ostberg, also an incredible musician, has believed in me and supported me from the first moment I began to write music again. Their support has freed me from a lot of my demons.
The album is me. Different parts of me both real and imagined. It also incorporates experiences that other women have shared.
In many places it centers around a character who is in fantasy and is resisting an imposing reality. Tracks such as “Pretty Liar”, the albums title, highlight a thematic darkness – the abandonment of a child that leads to creating a false self as protection.
Some of the songs wrote themselves – I swear they did. “The Electric Show” was one – I didn’t even understand what it meant at first. It has an innocent idealism about it which I was surprised by – and yet I feel is necessary for me to hold on to.
I write on guitar. Though my lyrics are sometimes dark, on this album they’re often combined with beats and vocals that are exuberant, upbeat, and infused with a modern pop sensibility. That contrast embodies my personal experience with life – I seem to be able to find the spark of joy that has thankfully survived in me.
That ability is a gift, and has enabled me to create this music – which I hope you enjoy.
Love, Shoshana.
Lyrics
Little girl now don’t you speak
Lest you’re spoken to
Better turn the other cheek when I am angry
So I act like I don’t care
Never ask for nothing
And they love me cause I’m easy and I’m empty
But now I found you
And I’m gonna sing about it
My Affection
Gonna look in your eyes
My Affection
Wanna feel your body
Little girl now don’t you speak
Lest you’re spoken to
Better use all my mystique and make them want me
So I put my lipstick on
God you look so sexy
And they love me cause I’m easy and I’m empty
But now I found you
And I’m gonna sing about it
My Affection
Gonna look in your eyes
My Affection
Wanna feel your body
I almost went down
That river so long
I’m not gonna drown cause in you I found my soul
My Affection
Gonna look in your eyes
My Affection
Wanna feel your body
Wanna feel your body
Gonna call you baby
I’m alive today yeah
Pretty Liar
You are wasted and it’s 10am
Black mascara on his shirt you look away
so he won’t see your face
I’m so lonely
I can’t feel myself
Pretty Liar Pretty Liar Pretty Liar
Where is your father
When you walk the streets at 2am
You’re getting in cars
Collecting your scars and men
I’m so lonely
I can’t feel myself
Pretty Liar Pretty liar Pretty Liar
You were once an innocent
The sin was theirs to repent
No one came to your rescue
No one came
In the mirror
Is a girl who always knows she’s right
She puts on her shoes
And makes sure they’re tied real tight
I’m so lonely
I can’t feel myself
Pretty Liar Pretty Liar Pretty Liar…..
Good morning blues
Waking up here alone
Imagining you in bed with her
Did you get my call
I left you a message and I
Was pouring my heart into the phone
Hotel 99
I’m waiting here to make you mine
Hotel 99
I put my heart on the line again
A warm windy day
When we met in island park
You were holding me close saying I’m the one
Your hand in my hair
You said that when you got home
You’d tell her it’s over and it’s done
Hotel 99
I’m waiting here to make you mine
Hotel 99
I put my heart on the line again
You want it so do I
You tried but you can’t deny
Come on
Don’t let our love die
Hotel 99
I’m waiting here to make you mine
Hotel 99
I put my heart on the line
Hotel 99
I’m waiting here to make you mine
Cause where I am is home
You’ll never have to be alone again
Did you get my call
I left you a message and I
Was pouring my heart into the phone
He ran into my life one day and he wouldn’t stop to rest
He took my heart and my soul and said that’s the way we do it on the west coast
My beautiful name is the last one he’ll tattoo on his arm
Then he didn’t come home one night
And he sent me a text baby no harm done
Everyone they told me to move on
But now I’m smiling through the day
Cause in my mind I keep creating scenes
Where you and I are back together
And when I crawl in bed at night
I hurry up and shut the light pretending I see you again and we are back together
A few months later it was 5 am
And I woke to his staring eyes
He pulled the covers back and said I promise baby no more lies
He wrote me a poem, he sang me a tune
He asked me to go on a honeymoon
He was a little too late
the hardest thing to do was to tell him to go
Not baby I still love you
Everyone they told me to move on
But now I’m smiling through the day
Cause in my mind I keep creating scenes
Where you and I are back together
And when I crawl in bed at night
I hurry up and shut the light pretending I see you again and we are back together
Get over, get over, get over it
Got to get over, so hard to get over, don’t
want to get over it
But now I’m smiling through the day
Cause in my mind I keep creating scenes
Where you and I are back together
And when I crawl in bed at night
I hurry up and shut the light pretending I see you again and we are back together
The darkest street in Brooklyn
A young girl on her own
Her dress makes her look older
She should be safe at home
Crying shame
Crying shame
He pulls up slow beside her
A stranger in a ford
His smile is so familiar
A pull she can’t ignore
Crying shame
Crying shame
Daddy she’s calling
for you to come
Daddy please keep her
safe from harm
Innocent days are over
She pulls her hair back tight
No one at home will ask her
Where have you been tonight
Crying shame
Crying shame
Daddy she’s calling
For you to come
Daddy please hold her
Tight in your arms
Daddy she’s calling
For you to come
Daddy please keep her
Safe from harm
Crying shame
Crying shame
I don’t wanna come home to you waiting by the door
With your hand in your pocket
How could I Just forget to call like I promised that I would
I just want to disappear sometimes
And make you go away
But then I come around and I say
This time I’ll be different
Like you wanted me
This time I’ll be different
I guarantee
He don’t wanna listen to me don’t make no excuse
Turns his head to the TV
And looks right beyond me when I try to reach out for him
He just wants to disappear sometimes
And make me go away
But then he comes around and he says
This time I’ll be different
Like you wanted me
This time I’ll be different
I guarantee
There was a time way back when we felt so secure
It was my mind that just created it
And now I want more
This time I’ll be different
Like you wanted me
This time I’ll be different
He never gave her what she’s worth
Her only skill is on her back and giving birth
But she puts on a smile
She’s so happy
Happy
Before she met him she was fine
The world was her oyster but she gave her pearls to swine
Now wears them round her neck
She’s so happy
Happy
When she was just a child
She knew all she desired
But now she’s running out of time
Today she came up with a plan
Down on her knees she prayed for help to leave her man
He saw her kneeling there
And he was so happy
Happy
So happy so happy so very goddamn happy
So happy so happy so motherfucking happy
So happy so happy so so so so so happy
I’m sorry this world is so Insane
I wanna be the healer of your pain
But God made me
A human being
Hard
Sometimes life hurts you to the core
And your mind tells you that it’s your fault
No
Sometimes people are just wrong
And maybe we both gotta be stronger
Hard
You’re momma’s only child
So strong and free and wild yeah
God protect you baby
I’m sorry you’re feeling so afraid
And I tell you that I will always stay
Yeah
But I lie
Cause somebody always says goodbye
Hard
I was thinking bout the day we met I knew you were the one and we
Held together and said forever
We’ll never wander
When I’m gone
What will you
When I’m far away
When I’m gone
What will you
When I’m far away
You asked me directly how long I thought you and I’d survive
And I looked in the mirror
I started to shiver and shake
Then I said we will find a way
When I’m gone
What will you
When I’m far away
When I’m gone
What will you
When I’m far away
Look up at the sky
And you’ll see I’m flying… flying
Love is so hard to find
And I know ours will last ’til the end of time
I don’t regret it
I’d never get it better
Than you and I
When I’m gone
What will you
When I’m far away
When I’m gone
What will you
When I’m far away
She’s like a girl I knew
When I was a kid
She just won’t make a move without questioning
She likes the stranger things and helium balloons
She swears she flew one night and plans to walk the moon
I know you’re thinking you don’t belong
Welcome to The Electric Show
It’s really who you are
Welcome to The Electric Show
You’re beautiful
He’s like a boy I knew
Who lived out on the beach
He always tells the truth
Though a lie could set him free
He likes the stranger things and letters in the sky
He swears that statues speak when you look them in the eye
I know you’re thinking you don’t belong
Welcome to The Electric Show
It’s really who you are
Welcome to The Electric Show
You’re beautiful
Whoever said that individuals had to be alike to fit in
Whatever happened to the freedom we were fighting for
Didn’t we win
Welcome to The Electric Show
It’s really who you are
Welcome to The Electric Show
You’re beautiful
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